Do I have to believe everything I hear?
Nope. I have this nifty thing called a "Jenn filter" that helps me examine the messages surrounding me using my own divine wisdom. Try it! It's pretty awesome to let your body, mind, spirit and emotions tell you what's right for you!
Do I have to understand everything about the past?
Hmmm. No, not really. Sometimes I'd really like to. I have this inherent desire to live in a tidy and linear world filled with formulas like
if A then B
As in: if I am skinny, then I am happy.
OR
If and only if (IFF):
a logical connective between statements which means that the truth of either one of the statements requires the truth of the other. Thus, either both statements are true, or both are false.
So, for example ,
IFF X = my dad was around, Y= I would have not ended up with Bipolar Disorder.
In that case, X is necessary and sufficient for Y, and Y is equivalent to X.
Well, not quite. Those are examples of unrealistic "all or nothing" thinking. And I've given up on that...it really distorts my world and typically takes me on a downward spiral.
Do I have to withhold my truth?
Not sure. But I've decided not to. That means I don't spend time with people who are poisonous playmates, and I honour my right to be respected.
Do I have to take it one small step at a time?
Um, yeah, usually. You know that they say in order to achieve behaviour change, we have to practice a new skill on average about 20 times for it to become imprinted. It's all about making realistic expectations of ourselves and looking for the smallest thing to alter that could have the biggest impact.
Do I have to try new things?
Not necessarily, but I want to. Like right now I'm taking a short fiction writing course with my dear friend Chris Kay Fraser, who offers tonnes of writing courses. It's really stretching me. I have to create someone who I'm afraid of because I don't know him, and I don't know his world. It's really stretching me, but the challenge is a good one.
Do I have to like something coz everyone else does?
Not at all. The fun of being me is that I get to explore all kinds of things....music, books, coffee shops, clothing stores, jewelery, people, etc. And I don't have to like them all. I don't have to like any of them. I get to choose what makes me happy!
Sunday, August 3, 2008
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Loved your post...
ReplyDeleteI'm particularly curious about your writing course - "I have to create someone who I'm afraid of because I don't know him, and I don't know his world. It's really stretching me, but the challenge is a good one."
Sounds like a huge undertaking, (for me) - will you post it here?
These are really good thoughts. I especially liked not having to understand your past. That's really true. If we can only move forward once the past is completely rehashed, understood, gone over under a microscope, it would be hard to live in the present and/or look forward to the future.
ReplyDeleteWhat an interesting, gutsy list. The "Do I have to withhold my truth" got to me because it sings of strength of personhood. Some of these lessons are hard learned; I apreciate the resolve and positive energy here.
ReplyDeleteI try not to spend too much time in the distant past. Very nice post!!
ReplyDeleteI really like your way of thinking, and writing. Thanks for your encouragement on my blog also. Cheers
ReplyDeleteLove this. I get the math part too: I remember Functions and Relations really well from high school- all those equations !
ReplyDeleteThis is truly how the mind works to a large extent.
It was a pleasure to read!
I loved the math part; brings back Functions & Relations class from high school- all the equations. Which I found made a lot of sense- and yes our minds to work like that.
ReplyDeleteReading it I could almost see my mind churning away.
The whole writing was so real.