Sunday Scribblings #63- Somewhere

Somewhere can be here
We can live our dreams NOW
Make them reality


Paul's sunflower at 152 Cambridge last year....somewhere is here!

So somewhere is as simple as this:

Follow your bliss and the
universe will open doors
for you where only walls
were

******Joseph Campbell*******

>>> That's all.
>>>>> Why make it so fucking complicated?

Creative Co-Construction

From July 25-27, 2008 I was at Hillside Festival in Guelph Ontario.

Hillside is an impressively conscious indie-music festival. There are no wasted beer cups, water bottles, or food-stuffs. From compost bins to volunteers-who-wash-your-plates-and-cutlery to mandated-purchase-of-beer-steins to empty-milk-trucks-filled-with-free-water, it is a limited footprint situation. Weekend-long music and workshops (drumming, dancing, sex education, crafting), Tibetan monks, and a Sunday Gospel hour...something for everyone!



I was a workshop presenter at Hillside. I did 2 Nia workshops there.

But that's not the best part.

My friend Alex Hickey provided the inspiration for the Nia workshops at Hillside. You see, Alex recently released her first album, Love Bites, which was the diving-off point for the Nia routine at Hillside.



We danced to 3 songs from her album:

2 tvs
Run Away
A Single Thing

Alex, who wrote her first song, (apparently about social disenfranchisement), at age 5, has been a creative inspiration for me. Her album, Love Bites, is everything a break-up album should be: heartfelt, bittersweet, funny, chock full of feelings about bad endings, new beginnings, grudges, longing and loss.

To top it off, her album mirrors what Nia is all about ~ "Dancing Through Life", "Life as Art" and the feeling that "Through Movement We Find Health".

Thank you Alex, for providing me with the inspiration to make my workshops at Hillside speak to the world!

Oh yeah, I bought this *awesome* bamboo rock-band tshirt from Alex with her rockin' logo on it. It's pretty snazzy, washes well, and makes me feel all warm, fuzzy and sustainable-like!

By the way, if you're considering Hillside in 2009, I highly recommend it - this was the musical line-up for 2008 (Alex Hickey is more than likely to rock the scene in 2009 or 2010 and we'll have a HUGE on-stage larger-than-life Nia celebration going!)

The Abrams Brothers (Friday)
The Acorn
Akron/Family
The Arrogant Worms (Friday)
Joseph Arthur
Bell Orchestre (Sunday)
Black Cabbage
Born Ruffians
The Bourbon Tabernacle Choir (Saturday Evening)
Broken Social Scene (Sunday evening)
Brothers Creeggan
The Burning Hell
David Celia
Chris Brown & Kate Fenner
Jason Collett
Cowboy Junkies (Friday)
Culture Reject
Dubblestandart
Elliott Brood
The Foggy Hogtown Boys
Sue Foley
Jaymay
The Good Brothers
James Gordon & Sons
Jenn Grant
Haale
Harri Palm & the Solo Pilots
Hayden (Sunday Evening)
Rebekah Higgs (Friday)
Islands (Saturday Evening)
The Kramdens
Land of Talk
Lights (Friday)
The Magic (Saturday)
Mandibles
Harry Manx
Danny Michel (Friday)
Molly Kurvink with 6lb. Head
The Monster Show
Moshav
Mr. Something Something
The Most Serene Republic (Friday)
Nabi
Old Man Luedecke
Evalyn Parry
Kelly Joe Phelps
Plants & Animals
Po'Girl
POP Montreal Presents: The Luyas, Miracle Fortress and Think About Life
Roxanne Potvin
Justin Rutledge
The Sadies
Hayley Sales
Sarah Slean (Saturday evening)
Meaghan Smith
Sue Smith
The Speakeasies
Spiral Beach
Rae Spoon
Taxi Chain
Thunderheist
The Vinyl Cafe with Stuart McLean (early Sunday evening)
David Woodhead
Hawksley Workman (Friday)

Sunday Scribblings #62 - How I met my {...}

How I met my Body, my Mind, my Spirit, my Emotions

***********************************************************************************

Boldly, my Body Blossomed
In the Beginning, it was aBandoned and aBused But soon Became deliBerate. ABout my Body and well-Being

My Mind. My coMpanion since eMbryonic tiMes. A rooM of security.

Spirit. Suffocated by StubborneSS. ReScued. Now Soaring.

Elegant Emotions. ImprisonEd, buriEd alivE. PsychothErapy. DancE. EmErging rEfrEshEd.

Taking a break from Sunday Scribblings this week

...I have been taking a wonderful short fiction writing course with my dear friend and most talented writer, Chris Kay Fraser

I have been super inspired by both Chris and my writing group pals. Anyhow, in addition to putting together a story (wow! I'm patting myself on the back for having delved into the world of fiction), this blurb came out of me a few weeks ago while at Cherry Beach in Toronto.

At first I thought it was some sort of head trip I was on (I was FULLY sober at the time, I promise!).

But after talking to my writing mates, they reassured me this is normal for writers.

I guess that's what I am:

A writer.

And normal.



Here goes:


It’s how you see it all.

Idea stew and mulligatawny messages.

Canvases without colour who plead for words and want to criminalize awkwardness.

Weighted souls that are filled with dense purpose alongside smokelit undercurrents which swivel under my skin,
simmering the sheath of my bones.

No time is told when clocks refuse to tick.
And lemons melt taste buds, raiding mouths with with majestic golden rays.

My laugh is grainy when I react.
The tap tap tap of my clicking bones sends sharp threats thru my spine.

And suddenly idle sounds grow unbearable.
When pink pompoms catch up with my toes despite snickers.

Shimmering sparkle flakes ride waves.
They are committed to disaster unfolding.

Words disconnected?
Fractured storylines, half digested sentences.

It’s how you see it all.

Sunday Scribblings #61 - Ask

(TALK RADIO 103.1 JENN-FM)

Now that you've told me about yourself, let me ask you, what do you need?
I mean if you could have anything, what would it be? What do you yearn for?

(without hesitation) Someone to rescue me.

What do you mean by that? Are you in danger?

Not exactly. It's more of a....uh....inner peril.

Peril? Can you elaborate?

Right, like a risk of harm. A threat to my stability and well being. Know what I mean?

Hmmm.....noooottttt really. Can you give us an example?

Ok, here's the deal. I only know duality. Good/bad, sick/healthy, right/wrong, yes/no, happy/sad, sane/insane. There are no "grey" spaces, "maybe" options or in between areas. These freaking polarities battle for my allegiance and it's bloody tiring, man. I end up living at the extremes and get spun out by their demands.

Am I correct in saying, then, that you seem to want to be saved from yourself?

Right. I'd do anything to find the person who could do that for me.

Interesting, but I'm pretty certain that's not possible.

I don't follow....

Look. You have to do *the work* to deal with those struggles.

The *work*?

Yes, the work. Self examination, self questioning....it involves figuring out how you can truly love and honour yourself and then learn how you take that compassion into every part of your inner and outer world.
It takes effort and commitment, but in the end, you can rescue yourself.

Surrender to what *is* would be nice...

Um-hum....

Sunday Scribblings #60 - Do I have to?

Do I have to believe everything I hear?

Nope. I have this nifty thing called a "Jenn filter" that helps me examine the messages surrounding me using my own divine wisdom. Try it! It's pretty awesome to let your body, mind, spirit and emotions tell you what's right for you!

Do I have to understand everything about the past?

Hmmm. No, not really. Sometimes I'd really like to. I have this inherent desire to live in a tidy and linear world filled with formulas like

if A then B

As in: if I am skinny, then I am happy.

OR

If and only if (IFF):

a logical connective between statements which means that the truth of either one of the statements requires the truth of the other. Thus, either both statements are true, or both are false.

So, for example ,

IFF X = my dad was around, Y= I would have not ended up with Bipolar Disorder.

In that case, X is necessary and sufficient for Y, and Y is equivalent to X.

Well, not quite. Those are examples of unrealistic "all or nothing" thinking. And I've given up on that...it really distorts my world and typically takes me on a downward spiral.

Do I have to withhold my truth?

Not sure. But I've decided not to. That means I don't spend time with people who are poisonous playmates, and I honour my right to be respected.

Do I have to take it one small step at a time?

Um, yeah, usually. You know that they say in order to achieve behaviour change, we have to practice a new skill on average about 20 times for it to become imprinted. It's all about making realistic expectations of ourselves and looking for the smallest thing to alter that could have the biggest impact.

Do I have to try new things?

Not necessarily, but I want to. Like right now I'm taking a short fiction writing course with my dear friend Chris Kay Fraser, who offers tonnes of writing courses. It's really stretching me. I have to create someone who I'm afraid of because I don't know him, and I don't know his world. It's really stretching me, but the challenge is a good one.

Do I have to like something coz everyone else does?

Not at all. The fun of being me is that I get to explore all kinds of things....music, books, coffee shops, clothing stores, jewelery, people, etc. And I don't have to like them all. I don't have to like any of them. I get to choose what makes me happy!